eldh, Flickr
Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more. Strap in. It could get bumpy.
Photo credit: eldh, Flickr
You can tell who’s doing coke#oscars
— mia farrow (@MiaFarrow) February 25, 2013
Really? I thought everyone looked very lucid.
I loved Michelle Obama in django.
— Chris Rock (@chrisrock) February 25, 2013
Totally stole her scenes.
Just photobombed Christopher Walken
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) February 25, 2013
How many people can say that?
Whenever one of the morons say I wear a wig, stop reading because they have no credibility & just hate.
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 25, 2013
Trump wears a wig.
I have my modeling portfolio and 39 episodes of Beavis & Butthead on my iPad. Nothing else.
— Melissa Stetten(@MelissaStetten) February 25, 2013
What else does a girl need?
It is now. RT @chrissyteigen: i really need to know how fast I could run the 40 now. is this an open combine
— Rich Eisen (@richeisen) February 25, 2013
Good answer.
Kate Upton brand turtlenecks? Nah that idea sucks
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 26, 2013
Yes. Yes it does.
NRA says everyone should get as many magazines as they want.I say, you can’t get a magazine until you can read one.
— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) February 26, 2013
Not a bad policy.
‘Dancing With The Stars’ should change its name to ‘Foxtrotting With Some Person Wearing Sequins Who’s On That One Show I’ve Never Watched’.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) February 26, 2013
It would be more accurate.
Gloria Allred is talking about cannibalism on CNN. This is the worst cooking show ever.
— Mo Rocca (@MoRocca) February 27, 2013
No kidding. They weren’t even providing recipes.
Happy Cinqo De Mayo! (I have no idea when/what that is–I don’t speak Spanish. Just trying to court some Latinos.)
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) February 27, 2013
Yes, happy St. Patrick’s Day to everyone as well!
Just took a little nap in my car in front of the gym. How many calories does that burn again?
— erinn hayes (@hayeslady) February 27, 2013
Enough. Go home.
No they haven’t. RT @realdonaldtrump: Many people have commented that my fragrance, “Success” is the best scent.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) February 27, 2013
HA!
hey nasa @nasakennedy can we just use the hydrogen floating in space to fuel long rocket trips to other planets? scoop it up somehow?
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 27, 2013
He’s giving tips to NASA now, people.
I’m tired of acting like I know how to use those automatic faucets in public restrooms.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) February 28, 2013
Right there with you, Jim.
We live in interesting times when news anchors soberly read tweets from the Pope as he leaves The Vatican in a helicopter.
— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) February 28, 2013
“Interesting” is one word for it.
Sending a bunch of nudes to my man while he works today….that fucker better have a lock on his phone!
— Adrianne Curry (@AdrianneCurry) February 28, 2013
Where does he work? I’ll go make sure.
Why DOES “February” have that extra R? It should just be “Februay.”
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) February 28, 2013
Or Febuary. That would be cool too.
I am not having an affair with nor am I dating Natalie Imbruglia. She has been a friend for years. No flirting, no whispers, total BULLSHIT
— Russell Crowe (@russellcrowe) February 28, 2013
In case anyone was wondering.
My boobs could feed a village
— jaime edmondson (@jaimeedmondson) February 28, 2013
O_o
Children would be a lot more fun if they just shut the fuck up once in a while.
— Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) February 28, 2013
Someone should put that on a t-shirt.
Words with friends is a great way to learn how few friends you want
— Whitney Cummings (@WhitneyCummings) March 1, 2013
BRB, gotta go download Words With Friends.
ESPN analyst: “This LeBron dunking issue is a manufactured controversy.”ESPN:”Coming up next, we talk about LeBron and dunking”
— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) March 1, 2013
The Worldwide Leader, folks.
Pharmaceuticals and booze RT @jkell88: @rupaul How do you stay so positive in a critical world?
— RuPaul (@RuPaul) March 1, 2013
Right there with you, sister.