Tipsy Bartender usually teaches you how to make drinks, but today he gives an important message about drunk sex. “If you hit it quickly enough the STDs won’t have time to jump on you.”
If you’re single and under 25, odds are you’ve been drunk the last 50 times you’ve had sex. Sober sex is like a wild quadricorn during college, and not much less rare after. Most people have never (I hope) actually used Tipsy Bartender’s STD logic, but we’ve all come up with some dumb excuses to not pull the ripcord. Even those of us who drink professionally need the occasional reminder about having safe drunk sex.
Is it just me, or did the end of the PSA sound a lot like Mooj giving advice in 40 Year Old Virgin? I’m surprised Tipsy Bartender didn’t mention the alligator fuckhouse.