Potty training is hard enough as is. Now a study says kids are more likely to drop a toilet seat on their little dongs than you’d ever realized.
According to researchers, the number of emergency room visits for toilet seat injuries to the dong, increased by about 100 visits each year between 2002 and 2010.
The injuries primarily incurred with young boys experimenting with toilet training — though some were also from adult males getting caught in the snags of the complicated toilet process.
One researcher told Reuters that he was “pretty surprised” to learn that one in every 30 genital injuries reported at the ER were the direct result of toilet malperformance.
Between 2002 and 2010 there were an estimated 13,175 toilet injuries. Approximately 68 percent were filed as “crush injuries,” i.e. a toilet smashing someone’s junk within its confines.
According to the aforementioned researcher, Dr. Benjamin Brayer of the University of California in San Francisco, the rise of ceramic and heavy wood toilet seats might be to blame.
Having seen a few baby dicks in my day (all relatives, not like in a basement) I’m shocked that this would be bordering on an epidemic. How can those little mealworms get caught in anything? These kids are probably going to the ER and playing pretend. “Oh yeah, my dick is so biiiig it got caught in the toilet seat because I’m just a big meaty donged kid trying to learn the potty.” Whatever, kid.